Rescue Operations: Prostitutes and the Gulf Oil Spill

Time to get myself in trouble again…

Have you kept up with the gulf oil spill? Seen the pictures of oil coating plants and animals in the marsh areas? Read stories of the various clean-up operations? Held your breath at the latest attempt to stop the leak (which fortunately seems to be working!)?

What would you think if BP and the U.S. Government had said that the leak could not be plugged? That there was no way to stop the flow. That best they could do would be to capture some of the oil, perhaps as much as 90%, but the remainder would continue to leak in to the gulf forever. ‘Instead of trying to capture the oil we’re going to put all of our efforts in to clean-up operations and we believe that in any month or year we’ll be able to clean up as much as 10% of the oil that spills during that period and we’ll be able to help 10% of the birds and other animals impacted.’

Dumb idea?

This is kind of what we’re doing with rescue operations to help enslaved women. All of the focus is on the clean-up and none on stopping it at the source – preventing it from happening in the first place. We save 20 girls, but 400 (4,000?, 40,000?) others are enslaved during the same period*.

The answer, according to many, is that we simply need to end prostitution. Good luck.

In this post Tom Davis talks about ‘Sex divorced from the Love that created it.” This is perhaps a dangerous (and ignorant?) perception. Especially if you want to help girls enslaved into the sex industry. It’s all nice and everything to think about sex and love together, but it’s not reality.

If you ask a woman about sex and love you’ll get a long dissertation on love and romance and maybe a brief mention of sex with the man she loves. If you ask a man you’ll get “I Love Sex.”

For women, sex and love (and emotions) are all intertwined. For men they are pretty much completely separate**. And you know what? This is the way God made us. He made women to desire sex only (or primarily) with the man she loves. He made men to desire, and I mean really really really desire, sex with every cute girl that walks by. And God didn’t stop here, he gave men a nearly unquenchable desire for variety in sex partners.

This is why we have a prostitution industry. Why we’ve had one since the beginning of time. And why we’ll likely have one for at least another year or two.

In his 5 level Hierarchy of Human Needs, Abraham Maslow lists sex twice (and it’s the only thing listed twice btw) ***. He includes Physical Sex as a Physiological need at the base of his pyramid along with air, water, food, and sleep. He lists Sexual Intimacy in the 3rd level of Love and Belonging. In discussions on this, more than a few women ask why it’s included on the 1st level. Men know why. However, as intimacy, both male and female can relate.

Many well-meaning Christian men very vocally disagree with me on all of this. Of those who have done so publically, several have later been caught with their hand in the nookie jar.

I don’t know why God made men and women the way he did. Why he didn’t give men a sex drive similar to women. It would have made life in our society much easier. He didn’t though and there’s not much we can really do about it.

At this point I want to interject something. If your husband’s sexual monogamy is important to you and he is sexually monogamous in your marriage – you are extremely blessed! The title of a popular book by Stephen, Fred, and Mike, ‘Every Man’s Battle’, is quite an understatement for many men.

Reality isn’t very romantic, and we ignore it at our own peril.

Do you believe that we can ever eliminate prostitution? Reduce it? If you answer yes to either of these I’ve got some miracle holy water I’d like to send you (for a small donation of course).

As long as we have men in society we will likely have a huge demand for prostitution. It won’t abate. It won’t go away anytime soon. We can call for an end to prostitution all we want, but to the average horny male, that doesn’t mean a lot. We can spout all the horrifying statistics we can come up with legitimately or illegitimately, but they’ll either get lost in the din of other such horrifying statistics about a host of other issues or, more likely, dismissed as exaggeration and lies.

So what do we do? With this reality how can we more effectively alleviate women being forced to work as prostitutes, effectively raped, in the first place? Instead of saving 20 after they’ve been enslaved and raped, how can we prevent 200 (or 2,000, or 20,000) from being enslaved or raped at all?

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Note: None of the above should be construed as support for men visiting prostitutes - just as pointing out traffic fatalities should not be construed as support for someone intentionally causing a traffic fatality.

* I am not saying that we shouldn’t be helping women caught in bondage. We should certainly continue these efforts.

** Men do enjoy sex (and air, food, and water) more with a woman they love than with a stranger - but they still very much enjoy them, including sex, otherwise. And ‘very much’ is rather an understatement.

*** Maslow was, to the best of my knowledge, not in any way a believer in any Biblical scriptures and was likely a humanist. This is particularly evident with the top level of his pyramid, Self-actualization. However, his model does accurately portray basic human needs and behavior and does so even for Christians.

Christians - Loosing Our Moral Authority (Part I)

In my previous post about the 40,000 sex slaves I included a link to Tom Davis’s blog (linked under the phrase ‘ignorant Christian’). This has gnawed at me ever since. Davis didn’t just parrot the 40,000 prediction, which would be bad enough given the shakiness of it, he went a step further and made up a story that it had actually happened.

After the 40,000 number was proven so grossly inaccurate after the 2006 world cup, the vast majority of NGO’s, government officials, politicians, and journalists shied away from it this time around. David Batstone a good example. In all of my searching and interviews I’ve found few who would touch it as a prediction for 2010, and not a single one, save Davis, who would say that anything even remotely close actually happened.

I asked Davis about this on his blog. In 3 replies and 1 blog post he chose to try diverting attention from his lying rather than fess up. Has he, in effect, been saying that whatever he says, truth or lie, is worth the reward? That for him, the end justifies the means, in this case lying?

This wasn’t a mis-statement or mis-quote on Davis’ part. It was a blatant and intentional lie. I’ve been a writer for a number of years. You don’t write the words he did by mistake. He knew what he was doing. He knew he was lying.

Confession. I’m very far from perfect on this score. I am a poster child for adult ADD (which I view as more of a blessing than a curse btw). My memory is often a rather strange jumble of things that often takes concerted effort to sort out. Much to the chagrin of many I often think out loud which then leads to either me correcting myself on things or to others doing so. The problem I’ve found with sorting things out before opening my mouth is that by the time I sort them out the conversation has traversed 2 or 3 other topics…

Writing unshackles me. I can, usually, take the time to sort through things and make sure that what I’m saying is both what I actually think and is factually correct.

As Christians we should take the moral high ground. We should be more honest than the rest. God does not need us to lie to accomplish his goals. Truth will win out over lies EVERY TIME.

When we lie we lose our moral authority. And do so collectively. Tom Davis telling a lie doesn’t impact only Tom, but his entire ministry Children's Hopechest* and all of us who are Christians or work in social justice organizations. How can we expect someone to believe us when we’re telling them about Christ when they know they can’t believe us otherwise?

And quite frankly, “I’m not perfect, just forgiven” doesn’t cut it.

Raising liars

This culture of Christian lying seems to start with our teens. We’ve built a little box that defines what a good Christian is. We are quick to condemn anyone who falls outside our little box. Peer pressure and acceptance, for teens, is extremely powerful. What to do when we inevitably then find ourselves outside the little box? Lie about it. It’s a bit tough the first time, but gets easier and easier each successive time.

How often is our little box, defined by our Christian Pop Culture, more restrictive than what God says? How often is someone condemned for something that is a sin in man’s eyes, but not in God’s? If you haven’t already, I suggest reading Phillip Yancey's Soul Survivor for a start on this topic.

This is all then massively exacerbated at many Christian colleges. At Northwestern College, Bethel University, and Bethel Seminary, all in Roseville, MN, lying is part of the daily routine for many. Students are required to attend chapel every day but many find it too easy to check-in quickly (yes, proof of attendance is required) and then sneak out the side door. Most professors require students to sign a statement on tests that they have read ALL of the assigned material. Not doing so will cost you a letter grade. Just a guess, but I’m betting a chunk of students lie about this one.

Many Christian high schools, colleges, and universities require students to sign ‘lifestyle statements’. Most of these don’t just govern on-campus behavior, but ALL behavior, 24-hours per day, until the day they graduate. These almost universally include prohibitions against any form of sex outside of marriage and any alcohol or drug use. Many also include prohibitions against smoking cigarettes, dancing, holding hands, listening to secular music, going to bars, and a host of other prohibitions. I know a lot of students who attend these institutions. Extremely few go more than a week or two without violating the lifestyle statement they signed. And when asked by authorities if they’ve violated it?

One friend told me that for her the greatest thing about moving to her local state university from the Christian college where she’d spent 2 years was the much higher level of integrity and honesty at the non-Christian university. That’s a very sad statement from a committed Christian.

Next comes adulthood. Adult Christians lie to keep their outward appearance inside the little ‘good-Christian’ box. We lie about some of our beliefs and questioning so that we remain ‘Christianly Correct’ to our Christian friends. And we lie, as Tom Davis did, not to protect ourselves from others opinions, but to accomplish our own goals.

And we wonder why Christians are held in such low esteem by so many.

More next week.

* Children's Hopechest appears to be a very worthwhile organization that I have supported in the past. The problem I have now is how much of anything they say can be believed given their leader's willingness to lie so easily.